Ray Romano is most known for his iconic sitcom, portraying a mammoth in the “Ice Age” movie, and many serious parts, including Martin Scorsese’s “The Irishman,” but his first job wasn’t so glamorous.
As a youngster, Romano cleaned trailer trucks to supplement his income. On “The Ellen Show,” the actor stated that because the trucks were so large and parked so close together, the cleaning lads had to squeeze in between them to wash them with long brushes.
In another interview, the actor revealed to Ellen DeGeneres that he lived with his parents until he was 29, and that their Queens house had only one bathroom. He only left his boyhood home after marrying Anna Scarpulla.
As they disclosed in “Double Date with Marlo Thomas and Phil Donahue,” their love story began while they worked together as bank tellers. Scarpulla started at the age of 18, while Romano started at the age of 25. They were both in their early twenties.
The actor would claim he wasn’t the “stud guy” at work because he rode his bike to work and still lived with his mother. Scarpulla said that the other female bank tellers were excited to see the “new guy” at work, but Romano usually arrived 10 or 15 minutes late on his bike. As a result, nothing happened until the actor resigned from his position two years later.
That’s when he asked her out, but he also tried to date some of the other tellers. Regrettably, the others declined. The show’s host wondered why Romano still lived at home and whether it was an Italian habit.
Scarpulla, in Romano’s defense, stated that practically everyone in their community stayed at home until they married. Romano went on to say that most of his acquaintances did the same thing, although many married sooner, giving the impression that they were more independent than him.
The actor also admitted to being “nowhere” in his profession at the time and having no clue what he wanted to accomplish with his life for most of his twenties. He found himself in “nowhere land” after dropping out of college. Fortunately, he met Scarpulla when he began doing stand-up comedy.
“She took a risk,” Romano told the show’s presenter because she dated a man who didn’t have a permanent job and yet rode his bike to work. “She now has her own movie theater.”
When the presenter questioned Scarpulla about why she accepted the risk, she explained that it evolved from a “friendship into a romance.” Romano was regarded by her as “funny, friendly, and lovely.”
They approached things casually at first, with no expectations, and everything flowed organically. Romano used Sylvester Stallone’s “Rocky” to describe their relationship:
“She has gaps, I have gaps, and together we fill gaps.”
Their first kiss occurred after the actor drove Scarpulla to her mother’s house, where they “made out” in the car. Scarpulla noticed Romano gazing straight out the window because he couldn’t look at her when they were finished. She made the following remark:
“That was quite embarrassing.” “That felt weird after that.”
Scarpulla went on to say that she didn’t care what he did for a living. When he stood up, she might have been a bank teller her entire life. She had no drive or desire to find someone more wealthy. The actor went on to say:
“I’ve always said, ‘If a plumber made the same amount of money as I did, she’d be delighted.'”
Romano had only been doing stand-up for about two years and was collaborating with a friend who owned a futon mattress company. He dated Scarpulla for two years before they tied the knot in 1987. Romano recalled an incident in which he became envious and determined they had to marry.
They moved in together, and Romano described their first night as “terrible.” He described it as a “crucial day” because of the decisions you must make, such as which side of the bed to sleep on. He elaborated:
“You consider that insignificant. But that’s your fate for the rest of your life. And I squandered it. I didn’t pay attention to the TV viewpoint. You know, you have to make the proper decision because I’m stuck with a huge toe in the middle of the screen for the rest of my life.”
Thankfully, there were little details that didn’t matter much in the end as their love developed. They had four children and went through more than most people could fathom, including poverty and riches.
Romano rose to prominence in Hollywood but stayed modest for a good reason: a quotation from the Bible given to him by his brother Richard: “For what can it profit a man if he wins the whole world and loses his own soul?”
The comedian stated that his brother wished him success in Hollywood but that fame and fortune would not consume him or cause him to lose his path. As a result, Romano hasn’t forgotten where he comes from or who he is.
Roman has entrusted the raising of their four children—Alexandra, twins Gregory and Matthew, and Joseph—to Scarpulla, who has stayed at home with them since their fame. She was “keeping the fort,” and they had a lot of faith in one another.
Scarpulla was the stay-at-home mom to Romano, the Hollywood star. When the actor was forced to relocate to Los Angeles for the filming of “Everyone Loves Raymond,” his wife remained in Queens.
They only had three children at the time, and they had no clue if his program would be successful. As a result, they were willing to make whatever sacrifices were required to make it happen.
Scarpulla was the most understanding and honest person, even when Romano was bragging about his accomplishments. When the comedy aired and he and his buddy, Kevin James, were planning to celebrate in Las Vegas, Anna mocked him about partying while she cared for their children.
As the comic boasted about having a national comedy in which he was the main character, she chuckled and remarked, “You’re still the [expletive] I married,” and they both laughed.
Fans of Romano’s comedy know that the majority of the tales on “Everybody Loves Raymond” were based on the actor and Scarpulla’s real-life experiences while raising their family. In real life, he worked hard to be there for his family while pursuing a great job.
During the last few years of the show’s success, his wife and children moved to Los Angeles, where they lived happily. Romano’s children grew up on set, and his twins are now actors.
Most significantly, he and Scarpulla were always there for one another, and he was there for his wife when she heard one of the most terrifying pieces of news anybody could get. Scarpulla’s gynecologist noticed a tumor on her breast and ordered testing, which resulted in a life-altering diagnosis.
Scarpulla called her husband in tears. Because his father was sick at the time, he thought his father had died, but his wife told him what they had found. They had the lump biopsied after that, but they had to wait an entire weekend for the findings.
They found out together on Monday morning, after having a Super Bowl party at their home. The pair had to put on a bright face for their guests, but they were terrified the entire time, despite telling themselves it wasn’t cancer. They attempted to stay cool until the findings came in.
They were in the bathroom when the phone rang. They both were emotional when they learned it was aggressive breast cancer. Romano didn’t want to spend time getting her treatments, so he contacted his boss from his closet and canceled a few appointments. The actor burst into tears there.
They were both in amazement for a long time. Scarpulla claimed that her husband was a hypochondriac, so when the news was eventually acknowledged, she couldn’t help but giggle at the irony, saying:
“You’re the one who believes he has cancer all the time. I never do, and I’m the only one who notices.”
Scarpulla, on the other hand, acknowledged she was relieved it wasn’t her spouse. “I suppose I’m stronger in that regard,” she explained to Marlo Thomas.
When Romanos’ father died on the day of Scarpulla’s operation, things became quite emotional. When they were traveling to the hospital, the actor’s mother called and told him that this may be his father’s last day. Romano’s mother called again while Scarpulla was being prepared for the surgery with the bad news.
Romano concealed the news from his wife, but she seemed to know, and they both felt that his father was probably watching Scarpulla, so her operation went smoothly. The actor stated:
“I learned how strong she is, and I realized, you know, I’m not the most expressive man, but when something like this occurs and you face the possibility of losing someone like this, it makes you realize how much you love this person. […] And I should mention that. The reason our marriage works is, luckily, because she knows I adore her.”
At that trying moment, the actor had to stand tall for his wife and the entire family. He was fantastic at it, and the entire event touched Thomas.
Meanwhile, Scarpulla expressed concern about losing her hair throughout her four rounds of chemo. Also, after raising four children, she disliked having to focus so much on herself. She elaborated:
“I take on everyone else’s worries, but this had to be all about me. That is not my personality!”
Fortunately, everything went smoothly for them. Scarpulla fully recovered, and Romano was present the entire time. Yet, because they had “dodged a bullet,” they chose to give back and share their story.
Romano has always admitted that he and his family live a wonderful life. Because of his prosperity, he can do whatever he wants. He did, however, state that he is “no different than everyone else.”
Romano mentioned that he wears a $12 Casio F91W watch that has been operating for over 30 years. Scarpulla believes it is the worst purchase he has ever made, but Romano disagrees.
The rest of his family keeps him humble, and they continue to inspire the majority of his gags and stand-up material. When asked if it made them feel bad, the comedian said that his children liked taking part in his shows.
Scarpulla, on the other hand, has complained, and the actor has stated that when this happens, he advises her to “go cry in a bag of money.”
Marriage, according to Romano, is “all about getting points.” He told the story of driving his wife to her colonoscopy.
The doctor ordered him to return in two hours because the surgery was lengthy, so the actor walked by a candle and perfume shop, thinking to himself, “I’m going to get some points.” He decided to get his wife a small present to cheer her up after her medical examination.
Romano also buys her flowers at random in order to maintain “earning points,” but she claims she doesn’t have to because she’s always ahead in “points.” As a result, his life is not unlike that of married couples who are simply trying to make each other happy as much as possible.
They do, however, argue about random things, as the actor later told Ellen DeGeneres.He claimed that he was in the toilet when his wife walked in “mid-argument,” talking about something that happened the night before, something every relationship has experienced. They’ve been dealing with it for over 30 years.
Meanwhile, all of Romano and Scarpulla’s children had grown up, although they, like him and his wife, stayed with them until they were adults.
The actor used to imagine that his children would never leave their father’s great homes, which included a private movie theater and other luxuries. Scarpulla, on the other hand, gave them a condo in Studio City and urged them to relocate.
Romano claimed that his wife was relieved that they had moved away for a week. She eventually began to complain about them not calling or coming over. But the actor reminded her:
“They never said anything to you when they were here.”
Their youngest son, Joseph, stayed with them for a little longer, but all of their children have already moved out. They are, nevertheless, still close. During the epidemic, his identical twins, Gregory and Matthew, appeared on “The Late Late Show with James Corden” with their father.
Romano mentioned to Ellen DeGeneres in 2019 that his family travels on vacations, including a trip to Sicily.
They had already been there when “Everybody Loves Raymond” filmed an episode in Italy. Romano and his wife decided to visit Sicily, especially the little hamlet where her parents had resided for 40 years before moving to the United States.
They returned with their entire family—13 people—and leased a small boat for the family, where Romano attempted to have sex with his wife. Because it was August, everyone was on the lowest deck, which had air conditioning. He and Scarpulla, on the other hand, stayed on the upper deck.
The actor turned to face his wife, saying they could get “frisky” and “no one would know.” Scarpulla answered, “For who?” when he informed her it would be “interesting.” They get along well and can laugh together.
That’s what Romano told Thomas when he inquired about what holds them together. He added that he is a guy who requires attention because he is a performer at heart, but Scarpulla is not one of them.
Me and the boys at #KevinCanWait #kevinjames pic.twitter.com/6AQYIs9zqJ
— Anna Romano (@AnnaRomano04) October 1, 2016
She doesn’t need it, she isn’t intimidated, and she doesn’t feel ignored when the focus isn’t on her. He confessed that he doesn’t always pay attention to her, but Scarpulla stated that she simply needed him to care for the family, which he always did.
She has regularly demonstrated this over the years by prioritizing her family, mostly blogging about them on social media, and filming TikTok movies demonstrating their closeness.
However, every Christmas, the actor would prepare a calendar for his wife that was filled with amusing comments about their family photos.
I’m a little behind on this, but I still love it. Didn’t know you could dance!🕺🕺🕺 @MattRomano19 @Joe__Romano @GregRomano9 @Allyromano pic.twitter.com/7HHD1UK2EK
— Anna Romano (@AnnaRomano04) January 25, 2021
Scarpulla, who has just turned 60, is now well and prospering. Her birthday is February 24, 1963. Romano couldn’t have been more fortunate in finding his ideal match.